Jul 03 2009
Crossdressing?
If you we dating a man and after falling in love discovered he had a propensity toward wearing womens lingerie, high heels, and wigs and wanted you to dress up with him would you, considering all the other crazy stuff people are into these days and after he never confided in anyone but you , accept it and love him in spite of it or leave him?
I chose to stay with him, we were married two years ago. I except him as he is and I love him no matter what. He is very heterosexual and had no desire to be with a man. And I accept it because there are many other things out there he could be into that would not be cool, so I figured with all the variations of sexual pleasure this isn’t all that bad. More often he prefers me to be the one dressed up. This seems like our own private little world and I love it. Thanks for the thoughtful answers.
Dazi,
When you fell in love with this man you weren’t aware of his need to crossdress. What you’re unaware of is that he’s probably done this since he was a child and as such it’s a part of his overall personality, and his overall personality is a big part of the reason you fell in love with him to begin with.
He’s not mentally ill or perverted since he’s simply a part of the 10% of the male population who crossdresses to some extent on a regular basis. To date there has been no conclusive research or findings as to what causes someone to be a crossdresser, but there are a couple of very believable theories.
Crossdressers are, by-in-large, 100% heterosexual and have no aspirations of being anything else. For most, dressing is a form of relaxation and a method by which to relieve stress. For some (especially the younger dressers) it is a sexually exciting activity, but in time this is usually replaced by simply a feeling of well being and contentment. I entertain the idea that this method of relaxation/recreation is far more preferred than the drugs, alcohol, etc, that are usually harmful to one’s physical health that some use as ways of obtaining the same relief from stresses.
You’ve indicated that he has entrusted you with his secret and that you’re the ONLY person he’s ever confided in. This should speak volumes about how much he cares about you. He trusts and loves you enough to have shared his deepest secret with you. And at a guess I would say that he wanted to be sure that you KNOW about this part of him before either of you commit to any long-term relationships. In all probability he is smart enough have thoroughly researched the subject (as most crossdressers do) and realized that it’s not something that’s going to go away. He knows that he didn’t volunteer to be a crossdresser. He also knows, as do all other crossdressers, that he DOESN’T know why he was born the way he is – he just was, and he’s learned to just accept himself for who he is and learn to live with it.
The main obstacle in regards to crossdressing is society’s lack of education about what crossdressers really are. But even more importantly what they’re NOT. Since about the only references about them that the public ever sees are on programs like the Jerry Springer show, it’s obvious that there is little exposure to the TRUTH about crossdressers. This is the very reason most crossdressers must keep their secret closey guarded.
If you would like to begin doing some research on your own, I offer you the CLEAN material on my web site as a starting point (see the link below).
on 03 Jul 2009 at 1:13 pm
If you can honestly deal with it then it’s worth saving. We’re all freaky in our own ways.
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on 03 Jul 2009 at 2:03 pm
Depends If you’re a freak,or not! To each is own! But most people would run from the situation. Good luck!
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on 03 Jul 2009 at 2:09 pm
I would so hope we were the same size so we could share clothes.
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on 03 Jul 2009 at 2:14 pm
well , one day he might just say, i’m catheryn from now on, so i would leave him
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on 03 Jul 2009 at 2:57 pm
i would still love him
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on 03 Jul 2009 at 3:46 pm
i would leave his crazy ass. men dont wear womens lingerie
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on 03 Jul 2009 at 4:06 pm
You have to think long and hard if you want this lifestyle. He enjoys that. He will not change
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on 03 Jul 2009 at 4:34 pm
You fell in love with him for who he is. A lot of people have crazy foibles. Does it really bother you? Are you afraid he’ll wear your stuff? (jk) I would say, accept it, if it doesn’t bother you (and he keeps his hands off your clothes when you’re not in them), and he doesn’t go around trying to pick up men. Why not, it could be fun! Me, personally I think could handle it, but only to a point, but then again what do I know, I’m a straight guy. Let’s say my soon-to-be ex-wife dressed as a guy to pick up women, then I would probably eventually say asta la vista baby! On the same token, she & I have split up because she went looking elsewhere for love (with other males). Good luck with your decision & I hope it all turns out well for you!
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on 03 Jul 2009 at 4:42 pm
Dazi,
When you fell in love with this man you weren’t aware of his need to crossdress. What you’re unaware of is that he’s probably done this since he was a child and as such it’s a part of his overall personality, and his overall personality is a big part of the reason you fell in love with him to begin with.
He’s not mentally ill or perverted since he’s simply a part of the 10% of the male population who crossdresses to some extent on a regular basis. To date there has been no conclusive research or findings as to what causes someone to be a crossdresser, but there are a couple of very believable theories.
Crossdressers are, by-in-large, 100% heterosexual and have no aspirations of being anything else. For most, dressing is a form of relaxation and a method by which to relieve stress. For some (especially the younger dressers) it is a sexually exciting activity, but in time this is usually replaced by simply a feeling of well being and contentment. I entertain the idea that this method of relaxation/recreation is far more preferred than the drugs, alcohol, etc, that are usually harmful to one’s physical health that some use as ways of obtaining the same relief from stresses.
You’ve indicated that he has entrusted you with his secret and that you’re the ONLY person he’s ever confided in. This should speak volumes about how much he cares about you. He trusts and loves you enough to have shared his deepest secret with you. And at a guess I would say that he wanted to be sure that you KNOW about this part of him before either of you commit to any long-term relationships. In all probability he is smart enough have thoroughly researched the subject (as most crossdressers do) and realized that it’s not something that’s going to go away. He knows that he didn’t volunteer to be a crossdresser. He also knows, as do all other crossdressers, that he DOESN’T know why he was born the way he is – he just was, and he’s learned to just accept himself for who he is and learn to live with it.
The main obstacle in regards to crossdressing is society’s lack of education about what crossdressers really are. But even more importantly what they’re NOT. Since about the only references about them that the public ever sees are on programs like the Jerry Springer show, it’s obvious that there is little exposure to the TRUTH about crossdressers. This is the very reason most crossdressers must keep their secret closey guarded.
If you would like to begin doing some research on your own, I offer you the CLEAN material on my web site as a starting point (see the link below).
References :
http://www.geocities.com/senorita_cd
on 03 Jul 2009 at 5:10 pm
I’m sure we could work out a deal. After all, there are some little secret things I like as well.
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